2 in a Million
by cartmanfan91
Summary: A new girl moved into South Park and Cartman quickly realizes that this might be the girl for him but isnt sure how to express his feelings towards her...but he better hurry up before its too late. Rated M for mature CartmanxOC
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I do not own the rights to south park, Matt Stone and Trey Parker do. Just writing a fanficton! So here is the first chapter, hope you enjoy it and feel free to leave a review :D**

As she walked through the hallways of her new school, the girl looked at her school map with a look of confusion and irritation.

Girl: Goddamn school, why does the map have to be so damn complicated

As she was looking at her map, she accidently ran into a larger boy. The girl fell onto the hard tiled floor. The boy was unfazed. She looked up at him, though he was a little chunky in the middle he was well built for his age. He had to be at least 6'2; his chestnut hair looked like he rolled out of bed and didn't care to look in a mirror. His amber eyes stared down at her with a mix of anger and annoyance.

The boy stared at the girl for a few moments. Her raven hair fell gently on her shoulders framing her delicate face. Her body seemed to have curves in all the right places and at the angle he was at, the boy could see a fair amount of cleavage. His eyes locked with hers and he sunk deep into her golden brown eyes. He quickly shook his head and brought himself back into reality and the situation at hand.

Boy: Watch where you're going next time, ho.

Girl: *She stops rubbing her backside* E-excuse me? I'm sorry I'm not quite sure I'm not sure I heard you.

Boy: What are you deaf as well as blind? I said "Watch where you going next time, ho."

Girl: Well maybe if you weren't taking up most of the hallway with your fat ass, then I wouldn't have run into you asshole!

Before the boy could respond, the girl collected her school bag and map and walked off in a huff.

Boy 2: Shit, dude, who was that?

Boy: Why the fuck should I care, Stan, she's just another stupid ho anyway.

Stan: Yeah, but if you have already forgotten Cartman, that stupid ho just told you off as if you were nothing.

Cartman: Oh whatever, she ran off because she was scared of what I was going to do to her if I got that chance, little bitch.

Boy 3: How could she be afraid of what you were going to do, fatass, she doesn't even know you.

Cartman: Shut the fuck up, Khyle, before I set you on fire like the rest of your people!

Kyle: Fuck you, you neo-Nazi bastard!

Stan: As much as I do enjoy you two fight like a couple of little insecure bitches, we do have a class to get to so I'll just be leaving now…

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~

After the bell rang for class to begin, the teacher, Mrs. Garrison stood up in front of the classroom.

Garrison: Can I have your attention class; I have an announcement to make.

Cartman: What is it this time, Garrison, you gonna get another sex change because you realized it sucks being a bitch?

Garrison: Eric, watch your mouth! Now as you know we have had a new family move to South Park recently. Well that family happened to have a child who will be joining this class for the rest of the school year. *Walks over to the door and opens it* you may join us now dear.

A girl walks into the classroom. As everyone stares blankly, Stan whispers to Kyle and Cartman.

Stan: Hey isn't that the chick from earlier?

Kyle: I…I think so

Garrison: Everyone this is Katt Porter, please make her feel welcome, okay?

Everyone just stares

Garrison: O…kay, well Katt, why don't you tell us a bit about yourself

Katt: Well, my rents and I just moved here from Canada, I really didn't want to but apparently I had no damn choice.

Cartman: Awwww, weak, that's all we need is another goddamn Canadian in this town!

Before Mrs. Garrison could scold Cartman, Katt retorted

Katt: It's better than being a fatass faggot with a tiny dick!

All the class and Mrs. Garrison could do was gape at Katt.

Stan: Wow…

Kyle: I think she's got Cartman by the balls, dude.

Garrison: Kyle, don't use that kind of language even though it's true. Now, Katt, please take your seat. Unfortunately the only one that is available is next to Eric

Cartman: 'Ey!

Katt nodded, and went to take her seat next to Cartman, all-the-while Cartman is shooting death glares at her.

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~~

Throughout the entire class Cartman wouldn't stop staring at Katt.

Cartman: _Stupid fucking bitch thinks she's soooo cool. What the fuck is her problem anyway? Probably just her Canadian blood…stupid ho._

The bell rings signaling the end of class. Everyone slowly exited the classroom, but before Katt could leave Cartman stands in the way and closes the door.

Katt: What the hell, Eric, get out of my way.

Cartman: Not until you tell me what the hell is up your ass

Katt: What the fuck are you talking about?

Cartman: What…the fuck…is…your problem…with me?

Katt: If you have to ask your more of an idiot then I originally thought and you ever stop to think it might have something to do with you calling me a ho and making fun of where I'm from?

Cartman: So what? Who gives a shit?

Katt: I do! I don't know how the girls around here react to being called ho but where I'm from we don't tolerate that shit.

Cartman: Oh really?

Katt: Yeah and if you call me that again, believe me when I say that I WILL kick you in the nuts.

Cartman: *Laughs* you and what army, ho?

Before Cartman could react, Katt winded her foot back and made direct contact with Cartman's groin. Cartman howled in pain and dropped to his knees. Stan and Kyle stared in disbelief as Katt leaned down and whispered in Cartman's ear.

Katt: One thing to remember about me. I don't make threats, only promises.

As she stood upright, she gave Cartman a crooked smile and walked away. When she was out of sight, Stan and Kyle ran over to Cartman.

Stan: Fuck, dude, are you alright?

Cartman: N-no…I'm…not…you…asshole…

Kyle: She got you good, dude, but are you gonna let her get away with doing that?

Cartman: *Slowly stands* Oh yeah, it's not a big deal, she just…you know…KICKED ME IN THE NUTS! Jesus, Khyle, you fucking Jew why do you have to be so goddamn stupid?!

Stan: So what are you gonna do?

Cartman: I'm gonna hunt down that bitch and kill her.

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~~

After searching the entire school, Cartman finally found Katt outside having a cigarette.

Cartman: There you are, you little bitch!

Katt: Ugh, you again. What the fuck do you want now?

Cartman walked up to Katt, putting her face inches from his own.

Cartman: You stupid little bitch, you kicked me in the nuts and you think I'm just gonna let you get away with it?

Katt: *Throws her cigarette to the ground and steps on it* I think I just did and if you keep calling me names, you gonna get punched in your fucking face.

Cartman: Pfft, like I'm scared of some wimpy little bitch.

This time when Katt swung her fist, Cartman was able to grab her wrist and gave her a crooked smile at the sight of her shocked look.

Cartman: What are you gonna do now, ho?

Katt scowled and swung with the other fist, but yet again Cartman caught her wrist. He was still smiling at her, and then before he knew what happened, Cartman felt Katt's lips on his own. Cartman's eyes grew wide and his grip on her wrist loosened. Her lips were soft and tasted a mix of cherry chapstick and cigarette smoke. He almost considered kissing her back but was too shocked to do so. When Katt pulled away she gave him a small smile. Cartman slowly started to smile back, but then felt a sharp pain on his right cheek. He staggered back placing a hand onto his face.

Cartman: What the fuck was that for?!

Katt: Which one? The punch or the kiss?

Cartman: Both! *gingerly rubs his cheek*

Katt: Well, the punch was calling me a bitch and a ho. The kiss was to distract you long enough to get my wrist free. So I just taught you two lessons.

Cartman: And how the fuck did you do that?

Katt: Don't let ANYTHING distract you, and to stop calling me names.

Cartman…I see…

Katt: Anyway, I'm off. See you around, Eric.

Katt walks off while Cartman stands there and reflects on what just happened.

Cartman:_ I wonder why she would pick kissing me as her distraction method. I mean she must have knew there was no guarantee that I wasn't just gonna get madder. Maybe she…no that's stupid to even consider, plus she's just another stupid bitch anyway so what does it matter._

Stan and Kyle walk around a corner. They run over to Cartman when they see him.

Stan: There you are, we've been looking for you all over.

Kyle: Did you find her?

Cartman took enough time to collect his thoughts and turned to his friends.

Cartman: Yeah I found her

Stan: And….what happened?

Cartman: She kissed me then punched me in the face

Kyle: What?!

Stan: Seriously?

Cartman: Yeah

Kyle: So what are you gonna do about it?

Cartman: *Looks at Kyle curiously* what do you mean Jew?

Kyle: I mean are you gonna act on what happened or are you just gonna let it go?

Cartman: *sighs* Dumbass she only kissed me to distract me long enough to get her wrist free so she could hit me. Besides just another ho that goes to this school. Why would I go after her?

Kyle: Maybe because she was able to stand up to your fatass and not even give a shit about the consequences?

Cartman: So? Just because the girl seems to have a set of lady balls doesn't mean I'm gonna want to date her.

Stan: Sure, whatever Cartman.


	2. Chapter 2

Katt walked into the new house that her parents just bought, there was still packed boxes strewn all over. She didn't bother to say hello cause she knew both of her parents were at work. Her mother was a doctor, and her father was a lawyer, so she barely ever got to see them. She walked upstairs to her room, as she walked into her room she tossed her backpack into a corner and flopped onto her bed stomach first. Her cat Harvey, whom was already sleeping on her bed perked up at her.

Katt: *sighed* Oh Harvey, why couldn't the rents just let me stay in Halifax with my friends? At least I would have something to do besides lounging around the house.

Katt petted Harvey and looked out her window at the house across the street. She realized that almost every house in South Park looked alike except for color variations. She continued to stare at the house, as she did a truck pulled into the drive way.

Katt: Must be the husband or something.

Katt watched as a 4 boys climbed out of the truck, two of them seemed to be arguing. Then she realized she recognized 3 of them. The two that was arguing was Cartman and Kyle. Stan was also there just shaking his head and interjecting whenever he could but she didn't recognize that 4th.

Katt: Oh, well I guess I was wrong. I wonder who the other guy is.

Harvey looked up at Katt a meowed softly, and Katt responded as if she understood what the little cat had said.

Katt: I'm not going over there; I don't care how bored I am. *Rolls over onto her back* besides I doubt they'll even want to be around me anyway. I mean I beat one of them twice today, and the other three seem to be friends with him so why would they want anything to do with someone who fucked with their friend?

Just then Katt heard a knock on her door. She sat up with a confused look.

Katt: Who could that be?

Katt walked down her stairs and went to the front door. When she opened it she saw the 4 boys standing on her door step. Her eyes looked shocked to even see them there but she quickly composed herself.

Katt: What are you guys doing here?

Kyle: Well, we just wanted to see if you wanted to come over and ya know…hang out or something.

Katt: *A confused look comes across her face* Why?

Cartman: That's what I said!

Stan: Shut up, Cartman.

Kyle: Anyway, how about it?

Katt: *Thinks for a moment* Fuck it, why not. Just let me grab my keys.

Katt closes the door. While she was gone, Cartman and Kyle start to fight again.

Cartman: I still don't get why the fuck you want to hang out with the bitch

Kyle: Because she just moved here and she doesn't know anyone so I figured she must be bored just sitting around her house.

Cartman: So let the bitch be alone for all I care

Boy 4: Wow, he really seems to hate this girl

Stan: Well no shit, Kenny, She kicked him in the nuts and punched him in the face all in one day

Kenny: Really?! And I missed it?

Kyle: Yep yep

Before another word was spoken between them, Katt's front door opened again and Katt stepped out. She closed the door and locked it behind her.

Katt: So where are we going?

Kenny: Just across the street to the fatasses house

Cartman: Kenneh, I swear you call me fat one more time I will kick your skinny po' ass.

Kenny: *laughs* I'm Kenny by the way *extends his hand*

Katt: *Gives Kenny a hand shake* Katt

Kenny: Nice to meet you Katt. So where are you from?

Katt: Canada…Halifax, Nova Scotia to be more precise.

Stan: Really? Why the hell did your parents move you here?

Katt: The rents got jobs here that pay pretty well and I guess they figured I could use the fresh mountain air.

As the boys keep taking to Katt, they make their way into Cartman's house. They all take a seat in the living room and keep talking.

Stan: You should meet Kyle's brother Ike sometime

Katt: Why is that?

Kyle: He's also from Canada, my parents adopted him when I was 8 because they couldn't have another kid and they figured I could use a little brother.

Katt: Awww, cool what part was he from?

Kyle: Ottawa

Katt: Never been there but I heard it's nice.

Kyle: I guess.

Katt: So what do you guys do for fun around here?

Kenny: Usually we just come here and play video games

Cartman: Yeah but you probably wouldn't be into something like that

Katt: I wouldn't be too sure about that

Stan: Oh?

Katt: Yeah, since my rents are barely around they made up for it by buying me a PS3 and a bunch of games

Kyle: Sweet deal

Katt: I guess so. So what games do you have?

Cartman: A hell of a lot, my mom buys me a shit ton of them

Katt: You wouldn't happen to have Army of Two: The 40th Day?

Cartman: Yeah, why?

Katt: I bet you ten dollars to a doughnut I can kick your ass in that game

Cartman: *Laughs* Oh you're on chicky

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~~

After getting beaten by Katt multiple time, Cartman finally had enough

Cartman: That's it! I'm sick and tired of this, bitch must be cheating!

Stan: Oh shut up Cartman, you're just a sore looser and you can't stand the fact that a girl is better than you!

Cartman: No, what I can't stand is knowing that a girl is cheating just so she can impress everyone.

Katt: Look Cartman, if you can't stand the fact that I am better then you I'll just go the fuck home! *stands up* Nice to finally get to know you three and Cartman you can go and fuck yourself

Katt walks out of the living room and out of Cartman's house.

Kenny: Nice going fatass

Cartman: Fuck you, bitch was cheating.

Stan: No she wasn't Cartman and now you just chased off perhaps one of the coolest girls I've met

Kyle: Yeah

Cartman: Who fucking cares

Kenny: I think I should go and talk to her

Cartman looks up at Kenny with a look of mild anger

Cartman: You mean go and try to fuck her you ho

Kenny: Do you really think I would go and do that?

Cartman: Yes! She is now one of the only girls you haven't fucked and you like the fact you don't know what she is like in the sack

Kenny looked at Cartman and put on a jackal-like grin

Kenny: So what, why do you care? Like you said she's just another ho

Kenny stands up and starts to make his way to Cartman's door

Kenny: If I'm not back in 20 minutes you know why

Cartman stood up and grabbed Kenny by the shirt

Cartman: Oh no you don't, you po' piece of shit. If anyone is gonna go over there it won't be you.

Stan: I will, I mean I have a girlfriend so I don't have any need to sleep with her and I actually think she's cool

Cartman: Fine, you can go Stan. And I guess you can tell her I'm sorry or whatever

Stan: *Stands up* I'll be back

Stan walks out of Cartman's house and sees Katt sitting on her front step having a smoke with an angry look on her face. Stan makes his was across the street, and when Katt notices him he smiles and gives her a friends wave. She smiles gently back and gives him a small wave.

Stan: Hey, you mind if I join you?

Katt: Not at all *gestures to the steps*

Stan: *Sits down* So…I'm sorry about Cartman, he's just use to getting what he wants all the time.

Katt: I noticed, but its ok I get it. I'm an outsider and not to mention I did beat him twice today so I can see why he would hate me.

Stan: *Smiles* He doesn't hate you, he's just not use to you is all. You were right when you said you were an outsider. The 4 of us have been friends since we were infants and it's been that way ever since. So he is just putting up a defense until he gets use to you.

Katt: I don't know…

Stan: If it makes you feel any better he asked me to tell you he is sorry and that you are welcome back over.

Katt: Really? That's surprising

Stan: I agree, it's not like Cartman to apologize so he must think you're ok. So how about it, wanna come back over?

Katt: *Thinks for a moment* Sure why not. Thanks.

Stan: No problem


	3. Chapter 3

As Stan walked towards Katt's house, Kenny couldn't help but stare at her through the living room window.

Kenny: Man that Katt is one hot piece of ass, huh?

Cartman growled under his breath. He didn't like the fact that Kenny already had Katt in his cross hairs. The sudden thought of the kiss that he and Katt shared popped into his mind but he quickly shook it off.

Cartman: Whatever, she's just another ho for you to try and fuck anyway.

Kenny: *Turns to Cartman and raises and eyebrow* Oh? I thought you said I didn't stand a chance with her.

Cartman: I still think that, doesn't mean your po' ass won't try.

Kyle: And why do you care so much?

Cartman just muttered an answer, thankfully before anyone could ask what he said Stan and Katt walked back into the house. A tiny smile came onto Cartman's face when he seen her.

Kyle: Welcome back.

Katt: Thanks *She turns and looks at Cartman* Hey…

Cartman: What?

Katt: Can I talk to you alone for a second?

Cartman stared at Katt with an inquisitive look on his face but finally grunted and stood up

Cartman: Fine, but make it quick. I'm getting hungry.

Katt: Sure, no problem.

Katt and Cartman walk out of the living room and as soon as the other boys were sure they were out of ear shot, they started whispering amongst themselves

Kenny: Why the hell would she want to be alone with him? *Looks straight at Stan*

Stan: Why are you looking at me? All I did was convince her to come back over, and that's all

Kyle: You sure that you didn't say anything else?

Stan: Like what? All I said was that Cartman said that he was sorry and that she was welcome back over to hang out.

Kenny: Oh great, make the fatass look like a Mr. Nice Guy, how the hell am I gonna get into her pants when she thinks Cartman is sooo great

Stan: Why don't you try keeping it your pants for once, I don't want to lose her as a friend because you're a fucking horn dog!

Kyle: I wonder what they're doing anyways

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~~

Katt and Cartman walk into his kitchen. He turned to face her with a bit of an annoyed look on his face.

Cartman: So what did you want?

Katt: Look, I just wanted to apologize about today. I was out of line when I did and said all that shit to you.

Cartman began to look slightly confused

Cartman: What the fuck are you talking about?

Katt: I mean, I'm in a strange place around new people and I have just had my defenses WAY up. I just didn't want people to think that I was some push over that would take the insults that were flung my way, so when you started saying that shit to me I didn't want to just do that shit and get away with it.

Cartman: O…kay, it's not like you could have hurt me anyway. I mean look at you, you're a damn twink. I'll admit the kick to the balls hurt like fuck but when doesn't it?

Katt: Yeah well I feel bad and I just want to say I'm sorry and I hope we can put that shit behind us.

Cartman looked at the smaller girl, whom had a sad puppy dog look on her face. He tried his best to keep the straight face he had on, even though all he wanted to do was smile and the cute expression.

Cartman: Ah, whatever. Anyway, are we done here cause like I said, I'm starting to get hungry.

Katt: *Smiled* Sure, were done.

Katt begins to walk away but then suddenly turns back to Cartman and hugs him. He looks down at her, and then slowly wraps his arms around her body. The boy's massive arms dwarfed the girl; her perfume drowned his nose in a wonderful mixed berry sent. He took a deep breath wanting to retain as much of the smell as possible. Katt finally pulled away and smiled up at him.

Katt: Thanks, Eric.

Katt walked out of the kitchen and back into the living room. Cartman stood in his spot wondering what just happened to him. He wasn't acting like himself and this he did not like. There was something about this girl that kept drawing him to her, but he wasn't sure what. He finally grabbed his truck keys off his kitchen counter and walked into the living room where Katt was giggling at a story Kenny was telling her. Cartman glared at him the cleared his throat.

Cartman: I don't know about you guys but I'm starvin'

Kyle: You're always hungry fatass

Cartman: Shut up Jew, I'm not fat I'm big boned. Anyway I'm heading down to Shitty Wok now so if anyone else wants to hurry up and get in the truck.

Everyone looked at each other and shrugged. They all got up and walked outside.

~~~~~Nifty Transition~~~~~

The three boys got into the truck as Cartman locked his door. When Cartman turned around he noticed Katt walking towards her home.

Cartman: Hey, where you going?

Katt: Ummm…home. You guys are going out.

Cartman: Why? I wasn't just talking to them

Katt: Oh…well I don't want to impose

Cartman: Just shut up bitch and get in the truck.

Cartman opened his door to the truck and motioned her to climb in. Katt stared for a moment then let out a soft smile. She climbed into the truck and Cartman followed. She looked over at the boy beside her and waved. Kenny waved back. The trucks engine roared to life, Cartman backed out of his drive way and headed towards City Wok.

Cartman tried his best to keep his focus just on the road but could help watching Kenny making passes at Katt.

Cartman: _God I hope she really doesn't fall for his bullshit act. He's not good enough for her, I mean he po', smells fucking weird for not bathing, and no need to mention the fact that he's the town slut…_

Cartman gripped the steering wheel harder at his thoughts. It annoyed him that he even cared that Kenny was hitting on Katt. He never cared before who his best friend slept with, all the girls in South Park were sluts anyway. In the midst of having an internal argument, he noticed that Kenny managed to get his arm around Katt's shoulder as he showed her all their favorite hangout spots.

Cartman had the urge to reach over and move Kenny's arm, he didn't want his rotten smell ruining that wonderful scent that he encountered earlier. But once he realized his thoughts he mentally smacked himself.

Cartman:_ Get ahold of yourself! What is wrong with me? She's just some fucking chick, why do I care if Kenny wants to bang her? It's not like I want her for myself. Let her go and fuck Kenny for all I care, she's just another slut I want nothing to do with…right?_


End file.
